A letter to Hassan!

 What does promises mean to you? For me it’s the innumerable times I sat down to write this letter and it’s the inability to still convey the anointed gloom that I feel. I fret about everything wrong with this world, and you have appended two more; loyalty and betrayal.

Life isn’t all about greens and blues, nay? I wish you were living in your little abode with Sohrab, drinking yourself into oblivion from this detestable world. Everybody enacted their part by incriminating circumstances, but why did you have to be the victim of their actions always? You were robbed. You were easy-going on Amir’s gullible kidding, or deep down you knew how he truly felt and still anticipated that he would realize? Love isn’t always understood, nay? But why did you choose to love people despite all that pain?There can be none like you, sleeping in the dirt, waking up blithely and pinching the cheeks of hatred with love and apprehension that would garner agony. You are like the waves of the sea, for ages I remember I hated wetting my feet. But the sea never gives up, keeps trying and it always wets my feet before I leave, even if it’s just once. You did the same right? Reaching out to your Amir Agha even when you knew he was far away, beyond reach but also mentally carrying him all along?

I was devastated, is devastated even a powerful word? I despaired this callous world when Sohrab’s little heart sobbed, became ineffable, benumbed. You left a prodigy that deserved all the love in this world but all it acquired was torment. I fretted what a hopeless world we have.

I wonder if you loved your wife and son as much as you loved your Amir agha. At this point, I may sound even stupid, but I yearned that you remain ignorant about your origin, to not become penitent about loyalty and love In that small note I just want you to know that this world doesn't deserve a pure soul like you.